When I was young we didn't hear much about self esteem, dysfunctional families, addictions or emotional support. We were expected to play the hand we were dealt without sniveling. Things are different now. In my mental wanderings and wonderings and sifting and shifting information I have begun to relate this change to the rise in consciousness noted by Dr. David Hawkins in his book, Power vs. Force. In his book he details the results of years of research related to human consciousness. He has developed a map of consciousness that works on a scale of 1 - 1000. On this scale, 200 represents the point of change that moves us into empowerment. Below 200 the levels begin with shame and continue with guilt, apathy, grief, fear, desire, anger and pride. Beginning with 200 we move up from courage to neutrality, willingness, acceptance, reason, love, joy peace and enlightenment. We move up as individuals, groups and societies, countries - and the United States has now moved up above 200 range. Now, as a country, we have moved into empowerment and are focusing issues such as self esteem, cooperation, and oneness.
So, that being said, how do we begin to raise our self esteem? How can we begin to move up that scale of consciousness to the point of self acceptance and empowerment? I have listed my favorite approaches to building self esteem. Take what works for you and leave the rest for later or never.
- Find ways to get your mind off yourself. There are many other things to think about. Many people with low self esteem are self absorbed, always thinking about the bad things about themselves.
- When you do think about yourself ponder the positive aspects of you.
- Help someone else. This is one of the most powerful self esteem raising tools I know. Volunteer. Become a big brother or big sister, a free tutor, work with Habitat for Humanity, visit at a retirement center. There are hundreds of things you can do to help someone else who really needs help. Improving another human's quality of life is a huge self esteem booster - probably for both of you.
- Stop the pity party and throw a real party. There are children who have never had a birthday party and elderly people who have no one left who remembers their birth date. This is a better kind of party.
- Get a hobby that you enjoy.
- Find a way to meet new people who are positive in their outlook.
- Learn something new. If you didn't finish high school, work for your GED. If you didn't go to college and would like to learn more, study on line or at your community college. You don't have to go full time to get a degree. If you aren't interested in education, learn how to skate, or swim, or whatever interests you.
- Turn off the TV to eliminate the onslaught of negativity.
- Be grateful. Look at all you have and all you are and be grateful.
- Smile, laugh, sing. Smile at your reflection in the mirror and at those you meet - you will almost always receive a return small (certainly from the mirror, anyway). Laugh as much as you can - laughter heals many things, including poor self esteem. Sing, even if it's in the shower.
G.K. Chesterton said, "Angels fly because they take themselves lightly." Lighten up. Give yourself permission to like who you are. Do some of the things listed above. These will all add to a raise in your level of consciousness and move you up the ladder of self esteem.
